Year end thoughts......

Well, as I am anticipating the arrival of four am approaching quickly, I can not believe I am going to New Orleans for my 4th time. I have been looking back at the place I was spiritually and mentally only a year ago and can not believe the change. In twelve months, so much can happen.
Some highs and lows are : I just got accepted into my dream school along with my roomie, who I only really got to know exactly a year ago. Momma had a clean and clear year health wise. I went to Mexico and New Orleans twice. I have learned to listen to God and to learn from Him. My small group leader Megan left, but God delivered Jeanne. I finished my Junmore year and I'm working on my Senior year with a semester at San Jose City College under my belt. I have built my relationships at church and I've been blessed by the people that God has put in my path. I have started learning guitar as another method to bring glory to God. I am still on the worship team in the youth group and loving it! I have been blessed with the greatest relationship with my brother, yet now this phase has become tough. I struggled through the fall outs of a bad relationship and I'm able to call it a lesson learned. Hume 2008 really changed my perspective and how I comitted to my relationship with Christ. I began a biblestudy/mentoring with Emily and Yolanda. Kristina and I are sponsering a child through world vision. I hit my year of driving without a ticket... in daddys Lexus. I have started working at a middle school on Tuesdays with a group of kids doing a bible study. I quit voice lessons with Gayle with the hopes of seeking singing as a tool of worship instead of something just to be done. All of the NOLA fundraising! I did two San Fransico trips with the youth group - one we passed out food on our way to the winter retreat, the other we interviewed people about Christmas. Sal passed away. I went from blonde to dark brunnette to redish in a matter or months. I have changed from having no confidence in myself, to all confidence in Christ. Tammy and Tim got married along with Patti and Kurt - I did their reception. We did broom hockey for my 17th birthday. I took some friends to Montery for our first road trip by ourselves. Kimmy and I did the pictures at VBS. Prop 8 passed keeping marriage between a man and a woman. Mikes odd departure, after a wonderful year of working for him. Many struggles with seeing God even in the midst of life. Celebrations and tears with friends as we have all been on this journey together.

So many things........ I could tell stories about each of these, but I wont. I wrote these down to perserve them for the day I can no longer recollect the stories without being prompted by something. Though all of these different things, I have grown. Each event, struggle and joy has made me to be the person I am today.

In this coming year, I have no idea what is going to be thrown in my direction. One thing I do know for certain is that God is going to be with me, for His promises are never broken. With that confidence, I know I can face anything!!

I love you, have a wonderful new year!

Here I am to worship.

Here I am to bow down.

Here I am to say that you're my God.

You're all together lovely, all together worthy,

all together wonderful to me.

As this song was playing I found God's beauty. I was walking around my block and was completely stunned and forced to stop in my tracks as I looked into the sky. Right in front of me I saw a rainbow. Its colors were so clear and crisp. In a sad attempt to capture the wonder and the majestic feelings which were captivated inside of me, I took a picture on my phone. Stepping back to gaze at it again I saw that it stretched over the entire sky. And there were two of them.

I really do not know much about rainbows, but I do know that no person sees the exact same one from the same view. That is how God's beauty is, for each of us individually.

I was just studying Him and His beauty and this was the paramount picture for me. He reveals Himself so that He may be discovered. He longs only to be desired and for us to be in awe of Him. This God, our God who has the power to make the rocks cry out His praise desires our praise.

As this sight was slowly fading a neighbor drove by and asked if I just saw this rainbow. With hardly the strength or will to break away from this glorious moment in time I nodded, listening to her tell me she is rushing home in order for her to rush off again.

I don't want to rush anymore. I want to see God for all that He is. I want to discover Him. I want to be near Him. I want to seek Him. For I love Him.